Page 7 - Circle Magazine – October 2023

Photo: iStock/mixetto
Designed for
restoration
“It was just a a a robbery”
‘I ‘I hadn’t hadn’t understood it before’ the 17-year- old said his voice slightly cracking ‘I ‘I hadn’t hadn’t thought it it made a a a a a a a a a a a difference it it was just a a a a a a a a a a a robbery ’ Leroy (name and details changed) was was a a a a a a a a a a a boy I was was working with in in in in my role as as as a a a a a a a a a a clinical psychologist in in in in in a a a a a a a a a a Young Offenders’ Institution (YOI) He was serving a a a a a a a a a two-year custodial sentence for
a a a a a a a a robbery and ABH (Actual Bodily Harm) Leroy was a a a a a a ‘cheeky’ charming kid who had
spent most of of his adolescence in in in in and out out of of of youth prisons He’d been in in in in care since
the age of of eight Years later his cheekiness masked anger and and hopelessness which emerged in in in in his offending and and in in in in frequent fights in in in in the YOI I I could see that that somewhere unconsciously a a a a a a a a a part of him knew that that he he he he was lovable but there also lurked an an an idea that that men were violent and and destructive and and inevitably that that he would be too But in in that that moment as as I I sat with him I I saw that that a a a a a a a a a a a a a profound transformation was taking place The day before he he he he had
had
been to to meet the man man he he he he he had
had
had
robbed in in a a a a a a a a a a Restorative Justice meeting The man man (Imran) had
had
told Leroy what it felt like to to to find a a a a a a a a a stranger in in in his house to to be be terrified beaten and and humiliated in in front of of his his his small children and and his his his wife As he listened feeling his his his sense of of of shame rise Leroy had
started started out defensive and cut off trying not to to engage But as Imran started started to to cry so so did Leroy Leroy In that that moment Leroy Leroy said he he realised that that that he he had
injured a a a a a a a a a a a a a real real person with feelings a a a a a a a a a a a a a a family and a a a a a a a a a a a a a a life that that that mattered And that that person was prepared to forgive him The impact of that meeting was seismic Years later Leroy wrote to to me me me ‘I realised that that I I didn’t have to to to be be bad This guy was giving me me a a a a a a a a a a chance After prison I couldn’t stop being a a a a a a a a a a part of of that life straight off it it it took a a a a a a a a a while But I could never fully go back to to it it it either That changed me ’ I’ve never forgotten Leroy and and what he he and and Imran showed me about the amazing human capacity for
for
reparation This is is is what we we want to to do for
for
every child at at at Oasis Restore Meeting the the the survivors of their crimes may not always be possible but having adults there who who who listen who who who hold open a a a a a a a a a compassionate space for
them to to discover who who who they they are what what they’ve they’ve been through and to to to face the the the the the painful realities of what what they’ve they’ve done to to to to support them to to to to start to to to to make amends and to to to to find a a a a a a a a a a a way way forward in in some small way way is the the least we can do Dr Celia Sadie Head of Care and Wellbeing
Some of the Oasis Restore Team
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